Blog

Listening is the most underutilized communication skill. Some of us think a business or networking conversation is like being a contestant on Jeopardy.

By not being intentional—we often focus on the wrong things and spend our valuable time on things that do not bring us closer to the careers and lives we want. Here are my tips on how to get more intentional.

In the movie the Wizard of Oz, Dorothy endures a journey to the Land of Oz and a fight with the Wicked Witch of the West because Glinda (supposedly the good witch) did not let her know that she always had the power to go home. Without this information, Dorothy wandered through some nasty situations. Many attorneys are like Dorothy in that we walk down a career road—without the critical information needed to move down it.

In The Devil Wears Prada, Andie is failing at her job at a fashion magazine, and it is no surprise because Andie disdained fashion—its importance, and the people who worked in the industry. Moreover, she did not have a poker face on her feelings. While most lawyers don't disdain the law—their mindset hampers them anyway. Many do not see their own value. They doubt their abilities to climb the career ladder or to build a book of business.

We have all heard the adage, "You don't get what you don't ask for." And that is true, but to get what you ask for, many of us first need to overcome ask avoidance. Because if you don't overcome ask avoidance, you will end up with a stalled career.

In the movie Speed, there is a scene where they are unloading bus passengers from a moving bus because the bus has a bomb that will explode if it goes at a certain speed. Yet, we see one of the passengers hesitate to walk onto the ramp that will bring her to safety. Why? Because she is afraid and moving outside our comfort zone. While we may not be experiencing as dramatic an event—as that passenger, we still feel fear in moving outside our comfort zone in our career and business development. It feels safer to stay in that comfort zone. But here’s the truth. Nothing will change if you stay there. You will stagnate and not grow.